Today
I talked to my first boyfriend. We were a couple fo like 3 month. In this short time we had LOTS of downs.And to be honest I never really felt loved by him. And today, almost 2 years after we broke up, I wanted to clarify everthing.
Well, we first started talking about the usual things until I ask him if he were in love with me as we dated. He answered: “At the beginning not but during our realationship I felt in love with you.” My next question was if he really cheated on me, because there were rumors about him, that he kissed 3 girls at that Halloween Party. He said:” I kissed 3 girls on the cheek because we played truth or dare.” That really hurt but to be honest I was pretty glad he said the truth.
Then I wanted to know why he wanted to date me if he wasn’t in love with me. His answer was: ” I didn’t know you but I thought you were nice and you know after a while I felt in love with you, why are you asking?” I said: “Because I never felt loved by you, but never mind.” He: ” But I mind.” Me:” Maybe you mind now, but now you can’t change anything.” He: ” But I want to change something.” Me: “What do you want to change?! And how?!” He: “I wanna change everything, but I don’t know how.” Me: ” That’s the problem, you don’t know how.” Then he said: ” If I could I would turn back the time till the day we started dating and make everything better.” That really shocked me! I didn’t knew he could be that sweet. Anyways, I didn’t knew what to answer so I just said: ” I can still remember EVERYTHING we did togehter.” He said: ” Me too. I will never forget the day we kissed the first time at your firends house.” That was the next time he shocked me. After that we actually started talking about our relationship and what we can still remember and what have you.
I know This isn’t a very interesting story or you know a love story with an happy end or something like that. It’s a normal conversation and I just felt like writing it down and show you that to people who once loved each other, broke up and left a lot of open questions, still can talk to each other in the future and clear things up.
To the person who read this text, I wanna thank you for letting me have your attention for a few minutes.
